Queer Nature

What the trees want by Beth Winegarner

“But what if the knowledge being forbidden to Eve was … a kind of deeper communion with and understanding of the tree and the fruit itself, an awareness of her kinship with them?”

–Maud Newton, “What Did the Forbidden Tree Want?”

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this quote since I first read it, more than a month ago. My regular readers know that I think about that moment in the Garden of Eden with the Tree of Knowledge often, and I’ve written about it several times. There are so many theories on just who (Lucifer, Lilith, the Simurgh) that serpent in the tree was, so many theories on what kind of knowledge was forbidden to Adam and Eve. Genesis never explains it; it only says that if they eat the fruit, they will “surely die.” Why would our supposed creator threaten us with death just to keep us from knowing things? Why would they want to keep us naive and ignorant? What would they not want us to know?

Newton’s quote connects my ruminations on the Tree of Knowledge to another of my interests: the Green Man. This figure (like the serpent in the tree) is connected to many different deities and characters: Jack-in-the-Green, Robin Hood, Gawain’s Green Knight, Pan and Dionysus/Bacchus, the woodwose, Cernunnos, Herne the Hunter, and others. He’s also connected to the foliate head carvings so often seen on churches, particularly medieval churches, across Europe and into the Middle East. 

Why were the builders of Christian churches so eager to depict a figure that was clearly pagan in origin? Yes, there is plenty of evidence that Christian leaders adopted (or wholesale appropriated) earlier pagan traditions, in part to make it easier to convince people to join them. The way Christmas supplanted celebrations of the winter solstice and Yule, which we’ve just finished celebrating in the northern hemisphere, is a prime example. But to me, it feels like there’s something else at work. 

A foliate head in Llangwm, Wales.

Many foliate heads appear miserable, terrifying or both. Leaves sprout from their noses, mouths and ears. Their mouths are often open in surprise, or perhaps a scream; their eyes are wide, bewildered (literally) and frightened. In earlier, pagan times, these figures were comfortable with (and celebrated for) the close connections between humans and the rest of nature. But under Christianity, this connection becomes sinister. The woods and wilds become dark, dangerous, terrifying places. This becomes a pretense for domination; we seek to control the things we fear. 

But humans and the more-than-human world, as Queer Nature calls it, have long relied upon each other. While it’s true that, if humans disappeared from the planet, nature would be just fine, it’s also true that a wide range of plants and animals depend on us, just as we depend on them. Robin Wall Kimmerer writes about this extensively in “Braiding Sweetgrass,” including a story about how sweetgrass grows back stronger and healthier when a certain amount of it is regularly harvested. Regular pruning and proscribed burns strengthen plants and ecosystems. Wild animals depend on humans, not just for the ways in which we function as part of larger ecosystems and food webs, but also for our wildlife rehabilitation efforts. The Green Man’s woods and wilds were once our home; we were once much more consciously a part of nature and the environment than we pretend to be now. The Green Man, in his hybrid form, represents that history. 

Dominance over nature has allowed humans to flourish in many ways as a species — and Christianity has abetted that process — but we have also lost a great deal. We have lost the ways in which our nervous systems settle when we’re tracking, foraging, working the land or resting among the trees. We have lost the friendship and medicine of plants, the awe and wonder of seeing wildlife going about its business, the humbling sense of vulnerability and interconnectedness that is our natural place in the world. We (especially white people) chase romantic notions of Native Americans and their “connections to nature,” appropriating imagined spiritual practices because we have long since lost our own sense of indigeneity; either we became colonists, or our ancestors were victims of colonization. 

Racism and other forms of bigotry play a role here, too. Once white people saw wild nature as something to fear and dominate, we began treating Black, Brown and indigenous people as subhuman, as savages. Likewise, queer and neurodivergent people are marginalized for being too uninhibited, too transgressive to belong in human society. In “Black Skin, Green Masks: Medieval Foliate Heads, Racial Trauma, and Queer World-Making,” Carolyn Dinshaw connects these ideas back to the foliate heads and representations of the Green Man. “These aesthetically intricate, affectively intense images represent bodies that are strange mixtures, weird amalgams: they picture intimate trans-species relations.” She connects them to festivals like burning man, queer subcultures like the Radical Faeries, and “traumatic postcolonial contexts out of which new queer worlds are imagined.”

The Green Man in my mind isn’t shocked or terrified by his hybrid nature. He’s calm and present, glad to bear the horns and greenery that grow from his head. He knows what we have largely forgotten; that we are nature, and nature is us. He doesn’t mind if we eat from the Tree of Knowledge, if we remember our connection to the natural world. In fact, he’s waiting for us.

We Are Here to Help Each Other by Beth Winegarner

Photo by Ralph (Ravi) Kayden/Unsplash.

Photo by Ralph (Ravi) Kayden/Unsplash.

When we’re together, humans constantly influence each other’s emotional states. A grumpy person on our bus can leave us feeling cranky, while a calm doctor can soothe us from the moment she enters the exam room. When our kids or partners are testy, it can make us short-tempered, escalating a moment of tension into a fight. And when we snuggle into a loved one’s arms, both of us quiet and breathing slowly, we settle into a bubble of calm and safety.

In psychology, this is often called “co-regulation,” especially that last example. Scientist Stephen Porges believes that humans, like all mammals, were designed to settle their nervous systems in connection with others. We learn to self-regulate through the safety that co-regulation teaches us, and teaches our bodies.

“Our ability to achieve a state of regulation—and especially to be able to support others who are in distress—actually comes from our capacity and opportunity to lean on support ourselves. And we need the support of not just one strong relationship, resiliency research shows, but of many. We need a distribution of support, so that we have access to a wide range of relationships to keep us resilient without overtaxing any one of them,” Porges said last year.

Growing up and even now, it’s hard for me to feel 100% safe leaning on other people for support and comfort. I think it’s for a combination of reasons: being on the autism spectrum has made it more difficult for me to understand human behavior sometimes, especially when I am too trusting and wind up getting burned. I’ve been hurt a lot by people, and I’m still learning that, while some interpersonal harm is abusive, we also accidentally hurt each other even in the best of relationships. And then we mend again.

Co-regulation doesn’t happen only between mammals of the same species. Anyone who’s had a close relationship with a cat, dog, horse, or other sweet critter knows that we can soothe and support each other across species. For much of my life, I’ve sought comfort and safety from animals, cats in particular. They have helped me immensely.

The brilliant folks at Queer Nature talk about the idea that co-regulation can go beyond mammals, beyond other critters, to other beings in nature (trees, stones, rivers), or the earth itself. As someone who instantly settles down when I am among trees or by the ocean, I love the idea of co-regulation with these spaces. But is it “co”? Am I helping them return to calm and safety in the way they’re helping me? Sometimes I would swear I feel a tree lean into me when I lean against it, or the playfulness of water as it laps around my ankles, certainly.

Getting to these ideas, and accepting them, can be challenging, especially for those of us raised in white privilege, a white/human supremacist culture, and/or in a culture that values individualism and doing everything on your own. Humans in leadership have been dismantling close connections to nature for centuries, especially in an effort to eradicate those connections among the indigenous people of the Americas. But when you look at how many ways different species rely on each other for survival, it begins to make more sense. In her book Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer writes about how the sweetgrass grows better and healthier when some of it (about 50 percent) is harvested by humans. Or think about how our gut flora couldn’t live without us, and we couldn’t live without them. Nature is full of such examples.

I have been reading these ideas and absorbing them, ironically, in an effort to reach out more often to my fellow humans for help, comfort, and safety. I’m lucky to be at a point in my life where I have a lot of people around me who understand the value of community, particularly communities of care, and of not enduring something alone. And, slowly, it’s getting easier to reach out to them when I need. But that hasn’t diminished the value, for me, of finding comfort with my kitty, the shoreline, the birds in my backyard or a quiet grove of trees. I’m very lucky to have that, too.

Favorite Podcasts of 2020 by Beth Winegarner

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Podcasts are more popular than ever, and it can be tough to find the gems. I can’t promise that my favorite podcasts of 2020 will be ones that appeal to you — they are perhaps somewhat niche — but I hope some of you will really enjoy these.

In no particular order:

Feminist Survival Project 2020: Emily and Amelia Nagoski wrote an indispensable book in 2019, “Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle,” and this is their podcast companion to the book. They had a feeling 2020 would be a difficult year, but they had no idea how difficult it would be when they launched this podcast in late 2019. Each episode is full of chatty, useful science and tools for getting through life. Favorite episode: “The Madwoman.”

I Weigh: Hosted by Jameela Jamil (“The Good Place,” “Legendary”), each episode features a deep, vulnerable interview with someone who’s making a difference in the world. I love how honest and cathartic these conversations are. Favorite episode: “ALOK.”

How to Survive the End of the World: Sisters Autumn Brown and adrienne maree brown’s podcast about “learning from apocalypse with grace, rigor, and curiosity” feels a little too relevant in 2020. Early this year, Autumn did a series of wonderful solo interviews that focused on different survival skills: housing, health care, agriculture and much more. My favorite was the two-part interview with Queer Nature, which connected wilderness survival skills to trauma survival, nervous system regulation and much more: “Tactical Hope” and “The OODA Loop.”

Maintenance Phase: Aubrey Gordon (Your Fat Friend) and Michael Hobbes (“You’re Wrong About”) launched this brilliant new podcast late this year, with deeply researched episodes on aspects of the weight loss industry, including Snackwells cookies and “wellness” culture. They’ll be back with new episodes soon. Favorite episode: “Anti-Fat Bias.”

Rebel Eaters Club: Writer and teacher Virgie Tovar’s podcast features a lively and fun interview each episode on food, diet culture, and feeling good in our bodies. (Each one also features one of the guest’s favorite snacks). Catch up now and get ready for season 2, which begins on Jan. 5. Favorite episode: “Food is Life” (with SF Chronicle food writer Soleil Ho).

Feels Like the First Time: It might be cheating to include this one, since it’s only available to people who are Patreon supporters of “The Storm: A Lost Rewatch Podcast” or “Buffering the Vampire Slayer.” In this bonus podcast, culture writer Joanna Robinson (“The Storm”) introduces activist Kristin Russo (“Buffering”) to major movie franchises she hasn’t seen before, quizzing her beforehand to see if she can guess key plot points and catch phrases. Sometimes Kristin turns the tables and shows Joanna a movie she hasn’t seen before. Either way, they are hilarious and charming — and now there’s a slack where subscribers can live-watch movies with them each month. It’s some of the most fun I’ve had this year. If you’re already interested in either “Lost” or “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and want to invest in a quality podcast, it’s worth it to get this bonus podcast.

First Names: San Francisco's Ramaytush People and Language by Beth Winegarner

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I recently became a Patreon supporter of Queer Nature, a queer-run nature education and ancestral skills program serving the local LGBTQ2+ community. They teach ecological and situational awareness in nature, as well as survival/self-sufficiency skills. 

When I began supporting Queer Nature, I received a 30-page document called “Meeting the Land,” which describes their philosophies in more depth. One of their suggestions is to keep in mind that the flora, fauna and landscape elements in our regions had names before colonial/settlers gave them the names they may have today, and to be curious what those names might have been. Those of us from a white/settler/colonist background are definitely not entitled to these names, and we should not use them to signal that we are “good” or “not racist,” Queer Nature’s founders write. 

“Respecting first names is about a lot of things, but it is partially about a personal practice of remembering and honoring that these beings have been in relationship with other cultures and ways of knowing for a long time and integrating that understanding into our ways of being as naturalists in socially/politically/ecologically apocalyptic times. Just the fact that these beings have names other than their names in colonial languages, or Latin binomial nomenclature, is vitally important,” they write. 

When I wrote Sacred Sonoma almost 25 years ago, I included many of the Pomo/Miwok place names that were publicly available, wanting to lead readers down paths similar to the ones Queer Nature expressed. Many of these names indicate indigenous peoples’ relationship to a place. For example, one of the tribal villages near Cazadero was called Kaletcemaial, “sitting under a tree,” while another was called Kabebateli, “big rock place.” 

But after I moved to San Francisco in the early 2000s, I did not look for information about the indigenous people who’d lived on this land for thousands of years before. It was only after reading “Meeting the Land” that I began to explore. 

San Francisco history writer Gary Kamiya wrote a series of articles for the San Francisco Chronicle called “Portals of the Past.” In a few of them, he touched on the lives of the indigenous people who first made their home in San Francisco. 

About 4,500 years ago, a linguistically distinct group of Ohlone Indians settled here. The majority of Ohlone tribes lived in the East Bay, where it was warmer and drier, which may be why the San Francisco residents came to be known as the Yelamu, or “western people.” They probably got the name from their eastern neighbors. But they were also likely known as the Ramaytush, from “ramai,” the name for the western side of the San Francisco Bay, and that’s also what their language was called.  

Only a few hundred Ramaytush lived in San Francisco at any time, and they were pretty spread out. One group had a winter village near Candlestick Point called Tubsinthe and a summer village called Amuctac in present-day Visitacion Valley. Another group had a winter village on Mission Bay, just south of the ballpark, called Sitlintac; their summer village was near Mission Dolores, and they called it Chutchui. There was one more village near Crissy Field called Petlenuc. Construction crews and others have found remnants of Ramaytush activity in places along Islais Creek, in Bayview-Hunters Point, near Fort Mason, by Lake Merced, at Point Lobos and on the San Francisco State University Campus. The oldest skeleton in San Francisco, the 5,000-year-old remains of a woman, was discovered during excavations for the Civic Center BART Station. 

In my research, I discovered something I wish I’d known sooner. In 2009, 104 small plaques were embedded in the sidewalk along King Street, between the Caltrain station and the ballpark. Each one offers a Ramaytush word and its English translation, a public lesson in the indigenous language history of our city. I pretty much never walk along King Street, so I’d never seen it. 

I want to name that the Ramaytush were virtually wiped out by the Spanish Catholic Missionaries who established the Mission San Francisco de Asis in 1776, including Francisco Palou (a colleague of Junipero Serra’s) and Fray Pedro Benito Cambon. The last native Ramaytush speaker died in the 1800s, and there are only a handful of Ramaytush descendants left. Some are enrolled with the Muwekma Ohlone Tribe, mainly consisting of Chochenyo (East Bay). There is another tribe, not federally recognized, called Association of the Ramaytush Ohlone in San Francisco. This is not especially unusual. Although there are about 575 federally recognized tribes, there are another 245 who aren’t.

For those like me who haven’t or can’t take a stroll over to King Street, I wanted to make an online dictionary of these words and translations, grouped by topic. I only feel comfortable doing this because these words have already been made into a piece of public art, though I share them with the caveat that they were all collected by colonizers. Many more may exist, but they are not mine to know or share.

I’ll put the ones regarding nature and animals first, since that’s the idea that led me down this path of inquiry. You can find out more about how to pronounce these words, as well as efforts to revive the Ramaytush language, at the Reviving Lost Languages website. In the meantime, consider these words the next time you see a wiinahmin in your backyard or greet the hishmen in the morning.

Animals
Salmon: cheerih
Bird: wiinahmin 
Coyote: mayyan 
Dog: puuku 
Turtle: ’awnishmin 
Snake: liishuinsha 
Deer: poote 
Fly: mumura 
Duck: ’occey

Nature
Lightning: wilkawarep 
Earth: warep 
Night: muur 
Star: muchmuchmish 
Thunder: pura 
Chaparral: huyyah 
Sun: hishmen 
Day: puuhi 
Ice: puutru 
Tree bark: shimmi
Fire: shoktowan 
Morning star: ’awweh 
Rock: ’enni 
Hill: huyyah 
Sky: karax 
Sky: rinnimi
Evening: ’uykani
Water: sii 
Stone: ’irek 
Grassland: paatrak 
Bay: ’awwash 

Numbers:
Two: ’utrhin
Three: kaphan
Four: katwash 
Five: mishahur 
Six: shakkent 
Seven: keneetish 
Eight: ’oshaatish 
Nine: tulaw

Body parts:
Nose: huus 
Bone: trayyi 
Ear: tukshush 
Fingernail: tuurt 
Mouth: wepper 
Eye: hiin 
Heart: miini 
Arm: ’ishshu
Chest: ’etrtre 
Body: waara 
Finger: tonokra  
Tooth: siit 
Leg: puumi 
Neck: lannay 
Blood: payyan 
Foot: koloo 
Tongue: lasseh 
Hair: ’uli 

People/relationships
Friend: ’achcho  
Daughter: kaanaymin 
Old man: huntrach 
Wife: hawwa 
Older brother: takka
Father: ’apaa 
Chief: wetresh 
Boy: shimmiishmin 
Husband: makko 
Girl: katrtra 
Mother: ’anaa 
Son: ’innish 
They: nikkam 
You: meene 
Who: maatro  
I: kaana 

Actions:
To dance: yishsha 
To drink: ’uuwetto 
To kill: mim’i 
To go: ’iye 
To eat: ’amma 
To speak: kiisha 
To give: shuumite 

Misc. nouns/adjectives
Red: chitkote 
Black: sholkote  
White: laskainin 
No: ’akwe 
Yes: hee’e 
Ye: makkam 
What: hintro 
Good: horshe 
Bad: ’ektree
Alive: ’ishsha 
Dead: hurwishte 
This: nee 
That: nuhhu 
How: panuuka 
Pipe: shukkum 
Tule raft: walli 
Knife: trippey 
House: ruwwa 
Meat: riish 
Arrow: pawwish 
All: kette 
Cold: kawwi 
Tomorrow: hushshish